When I was a little girl I would rock and roll on the floor moving my head side to side for hours. It made me a little dizzy and then I would feel weightless. Rock Rock Rock right until I had rug burns. A detangle hair session with my mom and a spray bottle of ‘no more tears’ followed and sometimes if I had really rocked it a raggedy ann dance with the scissors.
I loved it. When I was rocking back and forth, the confines of the present world ceased to exist and my imagination soared. I transcended time and space frolicking in my make believe heaven. Or was it make believe? Little did I know that I was calming my mind and connecting with my timeless inner self. I was meditating. Of course I didn’t know those words nor would that definition have enhanced my perfect experience of freedom, but that is what it was.
Meditation. Oneness with the inner being. Re-membering with the time-less title-less sex-less mortgage-less beam of pure love which is you. and me.
When I was a kid, I knew just how to enter into this union of succulent freedom and tapped in to it all through my days of head whipping, swing singing, dance spinning, tree climbing, look up at the stars gazing child mush self. Later as I become more sure of things like that I am a girl/ girls are supposed to be pretty/ work first play later (if at all)/ drive this kind of car and wear these clothes I will be safe, I began to forget the gateway into that freedom and life became more challenging (and not as joyful).
In my twenties I began practicing yoga asana and that began to re-open that gateway for me. It started simply with that feeling that came over me during savasana (the last resting pose) and then tingled thru me as I quietly rolled up my mat to go back to the regular world. And then it would awaken when I was in practice or sometimes even thinking of practicing (Pavlov’s dog!). Then it began to spontaneously spring forth as I stopped to look at the sky or being with someone I loved. And now after years of calling forth that freedom it comes throughout the day in the middle of the most mundane of life’s tasks. Washing dishes, driving my car, pumping gas, walking (feeling each foot balance on the earth is one of my favorite meditations)… my meditation has become an intertwining of my life and awareness of spirit. When I feel that profound connection to nurturing source, a healing clarity comes over me. It is in this quiet, alert peaceful state that I access my wisdom and make my best choices. It is from this unified state that I am my most compassionate and am the most service to the rest of the world. When the inner self and earthly plane are in conscious union pure wisdom flows. Yes there are times when I am NOT in connection and I suffer absolutely yes… but they are more rare now than being connected and I have tools to bring me back into connection.
The tools of meditation, the guidance from those who have gone before us can be very helpful in times of disconnection. Sitting upright properly aligning the bones of the body, the subtle energies of our system, understanding how to direct life force with breath very powerful. Powerful and profound tools when your natural inspiration fails. These tools are only as effective as your experience of oneness to call upon. The true experience of oneness, of union, of meditation is a birthright. It is your natural state to be remembered away from the confines of the mind and societies labels. An experience that you may have had many times over when you had less opinions and judgements about the world. When the confinements on your spirit in this physical body were less. Can you recall that freedom in your childhood? What brings you back to that free spirit connection? Is it music, nature, service, yoga- your answer is your gateway and greatest tool of meditation. That is the first door to open and begin to rock and roll into your oneness with spirit, your divine wisdom, endless nurturing source. As an experiment today would you be willing to take away one of your “titles” or jobs and make space for free form play? Use the simple yet practical tool of “play” to rock into freedom and open the gateway to your deepest wisdom and joy.